“Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2” can take a hike. Ever since the game was in production, Activision and (to a lesser degree) Infinity Ward have been sitting high on the hog, deigning to bend over like a mother bird and vomit into our open mouths…and wallets. They made a great game with MW1, and they knew it, so they had some kind of team meeting where the topic of discussion—scribbled on a white board in the back of a conference room—was “How To Be Jerks About Our Success.” They implemented several steps towards this aim. First, they handed Treyarch…
Author: Andrew Allen
"New Super Mario Bros Wii" is part of covert Japanese plot to destroy American families, so that when they invade, we’ll all be too angry at one another to do anything about it. The damned thing is like the Ring of Mordor, it will turn you against everyone you ever loved. It’s not just that it makes you angry at your team mates, it actually brings real life problems in your relationships to the surface. My wife and I play together, and the constant head-butting we experience stems from the exact same issues we have when we’re trying to manage…
I’m not going to call this an official review, because it isn’t. I didn’t play through the entire game, and I probably never will. But "Bioshock 2" is just about the biggest disappointment of this year. I could not be more let down by the road they have taken with this project. The original was one of the best and most interesting games ever made, it changed the conversation about gaming as an art form forever. This was a landmark experience. So why on God’s green earth are they electing to follow it up with such a re-hashed, underdeveloped sequel? Brace yourself for bullet points,…
Look, at the end of the day, you have to know your limits. You have to know when God lays a gentle hand on your shoulder, shakes His massive head, and says, "I’m afraid not, my child." Sure, when you boot that new game up for the first time, the possibilities seem limitless. You’re going to get every achievement, you’re going to play the single-player twice, you’re going to make a difference, damn it! But then that level about three quarters through the game pops up. You know the one I mean: the lava world where every block you step…
When I first purchased “Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic,” I had owned an Xbox for about three days, and I wanted something to play that wasn’t “Halo.” With a psychological rigor that would have left Socrates speechless, I reasoned that “Star Wars stuff is cool,” and if I was going to have a second game on my new system, KOTOR (as it is known to many) should be it. My first attempt at playing revealed an almost obnoxiously complex RPG, and I quickly dropped it. Somewhere down the road, perhaps sick of “Halo,” I picked it up again…